chsdbacks Chapter 418 - 51: Decision Already Made
Chapter 418 - 51: Decision Already Made
I narrowed my eyes and stared at the number and name on the screen in front of me for seconds.
Just like I had been doing for minutes.
I wasn’t sure if it was the right time or not.
Would it be okay if I called now or would he be angry with me for waiting so long?
Is he... okay?
I took a deep breath, looked at the number one last time, then braced myself and pressed the call button.
Every ’beep’ the call made added to my nervousness, but... eventually... the call was answered.
"Yes, Clara?"
The first thing I noticed when I heard his voice was... how soulless it sounded. The gentle, caring tone he had always had for me was completely gone.
I swallowed, trying hard not to sound hoarse, and continued.
"Are you... available? Can I talk to you for a moment?"
He was silent for a short while, then I heard him sigh slightly, and then...
"Sure, we can."
I opened my mouth, I was about to speak, but...
"But before you ask, I’ll tell you. I’m fine, Clara."
"You don’t sound... good, though."
"You know my skill."
And with that, I paused.
Right... he had a skill that blocked negative emotions.
But when I remembered that, I didn’t feel relieved, that nagging feeling didn’t go away.
On the contrary, it manifested itself even more violently. A greater discomfort came over me.
Because... it was not a good thing.
At least as long as he was aware of it, it would never be a good thing.
In the end, maybe it would make him truly forget, truly unaffected, and he would be able to move on.
But it would also eat him up inside. Because that’s... who he was.
"I’m... sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry for."
"No, I have. Because... I saw it coming."
After that, he got really quiet, almost frozen.
"About a week before that attack... I saw someone about to fall off a cliff. And... there was... someone holding him back from going over the cliff. I couldn’t make out her face, her clothes, but she had black hair. Then... she smiled and started to cry. Her skin color faded, she collapsed, and disappeared. Then the one she had stopped from falling... fell into that bottomless abyss, right into the darkness."
"..."
"I’m sorry. I... I should have called you and told you that I saw something like that, I should have somehow informed you about it... But I couldn’t. Because I couldn’t connect the figure falling off the cliff with you, nor could I connect the black-haired figure with her. I’ve been seeing so many meaningless, even everyday things lately that I didn’t think they were connected to you, so... it’s my fault."
"Calm down, Clara."
"Seeing you fall off that cliff... you know what that means, right?"
"That’s exactly why I’m telling you to calm down."@@@@
"You’re not fine, brother. You’re just using your skill as a mask, even if you don’t mean to."
"Clara, will you listen to me?"
I finally stopped, I waited without saying anything, and my brother... he could only sigh deeply.
"Blaming yourself... is the biggest mistake you can make, do you understand me?"
I leaned back in my chair again, squinting my eyes and looking only briefly at the wall.
"But I... I don’t want to live like a normal person when there are things I can prevent. That’s the decision I made, brother. That’s... what I want. Because when I keep living like this, I’m not living like a ’normal’ person, I’m living with that guilt and desire that’s always inside me."
"..."
He waited in silence, he kept waiting... seconds slowly turned into a minute.
And at the end...
"Well, fine."
I don’t know why, a smile formed on my face.
It wasn’t because of the happiness I felt that he had agreed, not because I could finally let go of my inner demons.
But... I think it was because he finally started to see me as more than just a child he had to protect all the time, and accepted that I had my own decisions to make.
"I will speak to the prince, I will inform the kingdom of your existence, but... on one condition."
I paused, the smile fading from my face.
Condition...?
"Your status as a seer will be kept secret. You will be trained to learn and use your skill better, but you will be no more than a normal human being to others on the outside looking in. This is not only to protect ’you’, Clara, although that is my main purpose... but more to protect the ’seer’ you are. Do you understand?"
Ah...
That’s acceptable, I guess.
"Okay."
"Then... I’ll make the arrangements. See you, Clara."
"Bye, brother."
The call went off quickly.
My body was quickly enveloped by the intense silence that filled the room. But then... it was completely dissipated by the excitement coming from inside me.
"Finally..."
I’ll be able to do something.
*******
After the call went off, I could do nothing but stare at the wall.
For minutes, almost.
I can understand how Clara feels. It must be... really eating her up inside, being a seer but always being in situations where she can’t do anything.
But all I wanted was... for her to be safe. I didn’t want her to step into trouble when Lunerra had enough to deal with.
I wanted her to stay hidden from all of Lunerra, as much as possible, even though she would definitely be needed.
I... I don’t want to lose her too.
"That’s... what I want."
My eyes narrowed. I took a deep breath, then opened a holographic screen in front of me and dialed a specific number.
This is what you want, huh...
Okay.
If that’s the decision you’ve made... then I’ll do everything I can to keep you safe despite it.
"Ah, Aiden... sorry, I’m a little busy right now. Can we talk later?"
He went to hang up at the same time the call came on, but I didn’t let him.
"No, Prince. We can’t."
He paused for a moment.
"Huh...? What?"