chsdbacks Page 166
Page 166
how come……
How did things end up like this?
……
……
……
Jiang Cheng continued to comfort her, even though she could no longer hear him clearly, even though her eyes were blurred and tears were welling up in her eyes like countless mirrors, making it impossible to see his face clearly, she could still feel that he was comforting her.
The loose hair, stirred by the breeze, didn't actually ripple with any particularly dazzling effect. It hadn't been cut for a while and had only grown a little longer, not quite the long hair that a young girl's hair would flutter over her shoulders. Her cherry-colored eyes, rather than containing any so-called enlightenment, were more suited to being filled with tenderness, like a cherry blossom falling into the water, or into a pond full of cherry blossoms.
Even so, he still stood there, and that man, who should have been called an ordinary person, still looked down at him—no longer like a god, nor with any of the nobility of a bishop, looking at him with the blinding light from outside the door.
Can't move.
Nothing can be done.
His body was stiff as if he were about to die.
No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get close to her, he couldn't take another step forward, he couldn't even say words of dissatisfaction, anger, or tenderness... He couldn't even confess to that important person who was no longer within his reach.
I don't know when the slow motion started, or if it was just my own sensory illusion.
It seemed that even the trembling of eyelashes, the opening of lips, and even the shouts and curses coming from outside the door were drawn out countless times.
"Ah...I...I'm fine..."
"real……"
"You don't need to worry..."
Her voice trembled, and the girl's beautiful, clear blue eyes also trembled. Her rosy lips suddenly turned deathly pale in an instant.
—I'm no longer capable of doing anything.
So how could you be alright looking like this? — Jiang Cheng's emotional intelligence was evident in the fact that he didn't say this directly.
After draping the first coat over the girl, his hands could only hang limply at his sides, and he dared not do anything more.
Even a fool could see through that falsehood.
It was simply a subconscious act of caring for others.
Just like in Sky City, even though he had lost his sense of taste, he would still lie to Mei and say that he felt spicy. And when others were worried, he would still act as if he was fine and unharmed... even though his body and mind had collapsed to the point of breaking down.
But even if they haven't honed their acting skills over the years, how could they possibly fool a teenager now?
She's crying...
My heart is crying too.
Extreme emotions are the surging feelings that come from the complete unleashing of an inner dam.
When faced with something that cannot be overcome, cannot be resisted, and even the impact itself is a negative thing, they will instead start running towards each other.
In a game, such an outcome might simply mean remaining stationary, but in reality, self-contradiction will only tear the existing things to shreds. The result of going left or right will only be being torn apart from the middle, moving both left and right.
what……
what……
what……
I didn't even have the strength to continue speaking, nor the strength to feign that I was alright—
The lovely girl, whose every move could tug at the heartstrings of countless people, sat half-sitting against the corner of the wall, leaning against the wall, her eyes vacant as she watched the person important to her kneeling before her, bending down to put a coat on her, and endlessly comforting her, word after word... rambling on and on, offering words of comfort.
My heart felt like it was being squeezed by something, I felt suffocated and couldn't breathe properly... Even though the boy was right in front of me, I couldn't look at him as intently as I used to.
sad……
helpless……
Hesitation...
The cold of the past seems to have never gone away, and the Siberian snowstorms seem to still be blowing in my collar.
The more you try to suppress your feelings and pretend to be nonchalant in dealing with a painful experience, the more obvious those feelings will become.
If you rush off before your wounds have healed, you will surely face the same or even more serious consequences in the future.
The girl, who knew nothing about all this, understood nothing about all this, and had never been taught any of this, simply suppressed herself and forced herself to stand up and continue to face life and the hopeless cold... How long could such a wounded heart endure?
……
……
……
……
--have no idea.
he does not know.
"Stop overthinking, stop blaming yourself. You did nothing wrong, you're absolutely right to be alive. The only ones at fault are those guys, only..."
Ahhh...
I have this urge to drag Otto out of his grave, out of the underworld, and beat him to death.
I feel like I want to find Siegfried, grab him by the collar, and ask him why he chose to name Kiana after her, yet still chooses to educate his child in such a crude way.
Some even wanted to bring Kevin here so he could watch over his offspring, his descendants imprinted with his will, who would fight to save the world no matter what.
One is the source of Kiana's problems, and the other is the culprit who, if not killed, would arbitrarily control this girl's life, causing her to constantly lose important people.
One is an incompetent father with poor educational abilities who only knows how to run away from problems. He claims he will always be there to protect you, but he has never paid attention to your mental health.
The last one is the reason for the tragedy of all the members of the Kaslana family: the original sin bestowed upon them by their bloodline, which destined them to sacrifice everything for humanity like tools, to become the so-called shield of the people—Kevin, as described in Bianca's story, is also the true source of this.
Aside from Otto, it's understandable that the other two would go to such lengths.
Siegfried had just lost his biological daughter, and Tesla, standing beside him, offered him a shocking plan: to raise Kiana—half Sirin—as his daughter.
Kevin disregarded his own safety in order to fight against the Honkai, and Liu Ling Er Er 3, being a [-Ba Bo Shi], would never care about future generations. He could even use himself as a tool, let alone anyone else.
So apart from Otto, who has already been killed, there is no one else who can stand on moral high ground to condemn him.
"—Qi Lingba is Liu Baqi—"
sorry.
Why kill Otto so quickly?
This has led to the current situation where Kiana cannot be brought out as the culprit and severely tortured, thus resolving her psychological issues.
Kiana needs a cathartic release right now; she needs to vent her emotions through mental or physical battles, exhausting her strength and energy.
Perhaps, as the girl initially planned, engaging in behaviors that only lovers can do is also a solution.
But in this situation, wouldn't using such a method seem too despicable and shameless?
To take advantage of someone's weakness...
Just because of hormones...
At once……
……
"Holding the thought that you don't want to become lovers with Miss Kiana is absolutely unacceptable."
A gentle voice sounded in my ear, silently interrupting all my hesitation and doubt.
The boy, turning his head instinctively, witnessed a patch of white that was no longer pure.
Her disheveled hair clung to her body, and there were still traces of tears at the corners of her eyes. Her once pure and holy appearance had been replaced by a tearful face.
At this moment, it was she who, supporting herself with the flag and her trembling legs, slowly and unsteadily walked over.
She wasn't even dressed, only wearing long white stockings with suspenders that sank deep into her plump, white buttocks and thighs, leaving marks and streaks of crimson on the white fabric. She stumbled with every step, but the color in her eyes remained unchanged.
"Complaints are the greatest offering God receives from mankind, and the most sincere prayers we make, so there's no need to worry. Just pour out your heart to me."
"Don't worry about hurting me. Life force naturally carries an aggressive nature. If you severely suppress your aggressiveness, it means that your life force is severely atrophied."
"But……"
But you beat me to it.
I'm not even as good as you who suddenly appeared... I can't even push you off, I can't push you off Jiang Cheng.
How could anyone say such things? How could anyone attack someone so directly... attack someone far more powerful than me?
She could only continue to lower her head, continue to wallow in despair, and sadly confirm in her heart that Kiana was someone who could never grasp any happiness.
Even after he had reached such a point of self-abandonment, the voices around him still did not stop; that gentle, motherly voice, which did not belong to Jiangcheng, still blew in like the wind.
"If you want to blame or insult me, please feel free to do so. After all, what I did was indeed a very immoral act of reaping the benefits from others' misfortunes, from a human perspective."
"And there are actually some things that you'll absolutely resent if you find out later, so don't show me any mercy."
resentment……
why?
Even her already dull blue eyes flickered for a final moment—because it was clear that there was no lie in the girl's words.
She genuinely believed that there was something she didn't know about that was extremely unfair to her, so unfair that if she found out later, K would definitely resent her.
"Hmm... this..."
"Of course, it's because of my stance, my origins, and..."
The girl's fingertips, whose expression and posture were obscured, lightly brushed against her disheveled lips, as if she were indeed preparing to give an answer—but before she could, the boy's voice interrupted everything.
The outstretched hand seemed to issue a command, or perhaps it was like a traffic policeman trying to stop a vehicle that was breaking the rules.
In the last glimpse the boy could see before turning around, his cherry-colored eyes were serious for the first time.
"Mistelin".
"--Shut up!"
Even though only her back was visible, the expression on her profile, with her eyes filled with glistening tears, clearly revealed her dissatisfaction.
He's angry.
For me.
He was angry at the silver-haired girl.
This is the scene unfolding before my eyes right now, something I never even dared to dream of.
Jiang Cheng is angry at someone more beautiful and more important because of me. — This fact has never been so clearly perceived by Kiana.
Why are you angry?
Such things no longer matter.
Just remember, this is for my sake.
Moist, azure eyes gazed at the boy, who was only half-clothed, his shoulder and right leg exposed, reaching out towards the noble, elegant, and holy silver-haired girl… Even just looking at her evoked a feeling—
The girl wondered, "Why am I here? Why am I allowed to be with her? What right do I have to look her in the eye?"
He said.
"To be honest, I don't know if you understand these things anymore, but whether you do or not, I don't want you to say those things now... Kiana's situation can't be explained in just a few words. Speaking carelessly without knowing the whole story is most likely not to clarify things, but to accidentally ignite a new bomb."
Those eyes remained fixed on her, staring intently—Mistelin was still looking at her in that same way.
"—Please tell the truth."
The boy, who had suddenly stopped and couldn't even maintain his cheerful demeanor when he made a accusation, responded.
Her slender fingertips gently pressed against her chest, causing her soft, white skin to sink slightly, revealing an alluring curve. She tilted her head gently, like a saintly, non-human being.
"It's not just you, Jiang Cheng, but also Miss Kiana. Humans only feel tired when they are indecisive and uncertain. As long as they take action, they can be liberated. As long as they have the idea that doing so is the right thing to do, it doesn't matter even if they find out in the end that it isn't. It's better than just constantly wasting their time."
"Jiang Cheng, there must be something you want to say, but you can't say it for various reasons. Kiana must also want to continue her previous behavior, even if it's just reckless behavior, she wants Jiang Cheng to stay by her side forever and never be separated. It's just that I, this immoral guy, beat her to it."
"It would be such a shame if we, as people who have feelings for each other, couldn't express them because of some messy things."
The words coming out of the girl's mouth now are the same ones she said at the beginning.